Still, they're amusing. Check 'em out.

iPhone Buzz

We're still three plus months away from mere civilians getting to touch the thing, but the buzz surrounding Apple's forthcoming cellular telephone only continues to grow. Personally, I'm biding my time playing with Motorola's unlocked, Linux-powered, touchscreen music phone, the MOTOROKR E6. Other folks are amusing themselves by dissecting every bit of available media surrounding the iPhone, including this "Hidden Details of the iPhone Keynote" video from Actioncorps. This documentary-style video is ... well, it's the kind of seriously-narrated, conspiracy-theorist "journalism" that makes Apple marketing folk say, "That's weird. But, great, we didn't have to pay for it!" Then again, so's this column. That's the great thing about all you rabid Apple fans - the more you drink the Kool-Aid, the more the rest of us get paid for serving it up to you over and over again.

What cracks me up more than Steve saying how much he loves the Red Hot Chili Peppers in the keynote is that people are getting all hot and bothered over the notion that Apple might "start selling ringtones via the iTunes Music Store," instead of letting users load their own ringtones onto the phone, or even use iTunes tracks as ringtones.

Of course Apple is going to charge for ringtones! You think otherwise? Are you nuts? Ringtones are a billion-dollar plus industry. People buy ringtones like candy from all the major carriers. Why wouldn't Apple want in on this action? They're going to sell you a six hundred dollar cell phone, folks. They're not in business to show you how much they love you.

From non-replaceable batteries to $2 fees for unlocking "the magic 802.11n feature," Apple is all about making money. They make super-cool products and understand user experiences like nobody else. That's why I buy and use their products and will continue to do so. But it constantly amazes me that people keep writing things like, "The way I see it, if you're already paying $0.99 to buy a song from iTunes, why shouldn't you be allowed to use that as a ringtone? Hm?".

No, you shouldn't be allowed to use your own ringtone on an iPhone. That would keep potential profit out of Apple's pockets. Profit is the point of Apple's being in business. You want to use your own ringtones? Go buy some other phone (like the $350 E6). You want an iPhone? Suck it up and shell out the big bucks for the handset, the two-year deal with Cingular and Cingular only and, yes, for your ringtones. Apple is entering the mobile market as a purveyor of luxury goods. You want luxury? You gots to pay for luxury.

Note: When I review the iPhone in June or July and complain about the lack of user-installed ringtone support, feel free to email me a link back to this column under the header, "Words to Print Out and Eat," "Pot, Meet Kettle," or whatever more clever-er subject lines you can think of.

Lots of Rumors/No New Products

None of the rumored products talked up before MacWorld San Francisco have actually started shipping yet. That includes the two products that were actually confirmed debuted by Apple at the show. And still the rumor mill churns on.

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The latest buzz surrounds a possible 12" ultraportable MacBook Pro, a 15" MacBook, and a revamped iMac line that might include the groundbreaking new feature, "Black." Amazing that people lined up to pay $150 extra to get a black MacBook, I nearly tripped over my own feet to buy a 5G iPod when it came out in black, and now everyone's getting excited about the possibility of black iMacs. Remember when Apple "revolutionized" the PC market by introducing colored plastic housings? And then white ones? And now, back to black!.

Ice in the Winter, kids. It's all ice in the Winter to keep our Kool-Aid cold. But it is tasty Kool-Aid, ain't it?

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